Sacramento Weekly World News & Review

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Me... It's not like YOUR hands got nailed to the cross mom

Someone needs to prescribe Wellbutrin to all the Virgin Mary statues in the world. These things do nothing but cry. Now Sacramento has its very own whinger. I guess I'd be pretty upset if I got pregnant without even getting a little lovin', but seriously, this concrete chick needs to get a grip. It was 2,000 years ago. I have a dream that someday a Virgin Mary statue will cracked a smile. Maybe if she started dating this guy.

In related news, people that visit these hoaxes need to get a grip too. I remember earlier this week seeing some guy on tv saying he believed it was real, that the red stuff coming out of Sactoid Mary's eyes was blood that is. Now I realize that their whole belief system is based on just that, belief, but jesus christ, that doesn't mean you voluntarily flaunt your stupidity on television. Belief in Christianity should be like an uncurable STD; you let your family and closest friends know your problem, but you don't go around telling strangers about your disease.


  • Other, less serious side effects may be more likely to occur. Continue to take Lorcet and talk to your doctor if you experience drowsiness, dizziness, or clumsiness

    By Anonymous Vicodin, at 9:55 AM  

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